Robert Wilk, right, and David Pierce, descending to the dining room.

Robert Wilk will never be a critic. He is an enthusiast. I was amused by his communiqué of life on the Queen Mary 2. Here's an exerpt. –Gael

Day 2…

        Robert writes: Had a terrific Chinese/Japanese dinner at the Lotus last night.  Grilled tuna sashimi a little dry. Lovely sake.  Sweet staff.  Cleverly designed “oriental” dress.  Fun desserts.  Need to get menu for you.  It was an alternative to the Royal Ascot Ball.

        Great programs today: 9am – Pilates Mat Class. 10:30 am – Lecture  in the Illuminations Planetarium: “Archaeoastronomy – The Dawn of Science” with Charles Barclay, Royal Astronomical Society. 11:30 am – Lecture in the Illuminations Theatre: “The Only Way to Cross” – Part I, with Maritime Historian John Maxtone-Graham.

        Actually: I had the most gorrrrrrrgeous, sensual nap in the most gorrrrrgeousbreathing. Luscious and dee-vine and as it happens, a serious aphrodisiac. (Well, maybe it's just me.  Chocolate frozen yogurt is a powerful aphrodisiac for me.)
deck chair. Slept right through the Dawn of Science and John-Mastone-Graham, as well.  One of the most glorious events on board is
        Formal dinner hosted by a really clever, lively engineer/electrician, who started his Cunard career as a bartender, He had some great electrician stories. A real hoot! The nice thing about the staff hosting is that there's the ship’s good, complimentary wine – a Benziger Carneros 2006 Chardonnay and a Robert Mondavi Napa Reserve 2001 Cabernet Sauvignon.
 
        Sat next to Rose tonight so hardly had time to eat anyway, and I don't remember very well what it was I didn't eat. Rose is a gorgeously brashy, New York grande dame, born in Hungary. Her zest for life belies her young history of having been a medical experiment victim in Auschwitz.

        David (my Canadian partner, who's moving with me to Venice, his new book is “The Fifth Pillar”) had Evelyn, who tried to talk him into writing a gay Holocaust book. She says it would sell like kreplach. David's finished his second book, “Pairs,” and is in contact with a few literary agents.  If someone knows a dynamite one, be in touch.

        Salad lunch on deck, next to a huge Irishman who, it seems, was hiding from his wife. He had an enormous hat covering most of his face.  Seemed to work, but he looked hungry, not daring to expose himself at the Carvery Buffet, so I brought him a roast beef sandwich on pumpernickel.  Needless to say, he's totally devoted to me.  He also asked if they had ham and was ready to drop his disguise.  I think I don't want to know what happened next, since he didn't return.

        Missed the Cha Cha lessons with Petre and Roxana.  Also the Canyon Ranch Lecture on “Healthier Skin for a Lifetime.” The 2:30 pm RADA performance (Royal Academy of Dramatic Arts) was: “The Spotted Handkerchief,” an adaptation by a Clive Kneller of “Othello.”  I stopped by briefly, as I had assumed it was also a musical.  Left in a few minutes…

        5 pm: Canyon Ranch Fitness Complete Core/Abs and Core with Michelle.  Hurt! – But in a good way.  In fact, still hurting.

        By the way, I haven't gained weight on the three trips I've taken on the QM2 because you walk zillions of miles – three laps on the 7th deck promenade is 1.1 miles. Between the 1.1 mile promenades a few times during the day and after meals, the fitness programs and the gym, as well as going back and forth between the front (9,500 book Library/ Bookshop/ Lookout Deck/ Atlantic Bridge Room/ the Cigar Lounge/ Pavilion Pool, Royal Court Theatre, Connexions Computer Center, Illuminations Planetarium, Winter Garden, Canyon Ranch Spa and Medical Center and the aft, you do get exercise.

        So it's a very healthy experience. More or less…
 
        First Ball: The Royal Black and White Ball. Dance presentation by the ubiquitous Petre and Roxana. Love them. It's soooooo 40s, which was the decade I actually remember, with my first movie (an afternoon with my mother and a friend at the Great Barrington Mahaiwe Theatre) of "Meet Me in St. Louis" … followed later by "Flying Down to Rio" (my first Carmen Miranda show, whom I idolized) almost as much as Eartha Kitt in "New Faces of 1955," discovered by the great Leonard Sillman, who did a slew of New Faces on Broadway). I know every Eartha Kitt song in her repertoire, even Uska Dara, the Turkish one.  Try me. Eartha is not just about Santa Baby…

        As poor as we were, fortunately my father loved movies, so we went every Sunday night… followed by chocolate marshmallow sundaes at Val's.  A tradition that started early was when we got home, everyone sat themselves in the “parlor” while I went upstairs for three costume changes at least, and redid the movie with my own twist.  My father and mother each rewarded me with a dime.  My three sisters were not nearly as talented as I.  Believe me.

        Ohmygawd. I look out the window, and I'm on the QM2, not in Great Barrington.  Isn't life great?!

        Cunard Classic Cocktail of the Day:

        "Jasmine & Rose Petal Martini: Bombay Sapphire Gin, subtle hints of Rose and Jasmine flavors and a dash of refreshing Cranberry Juice delight the palate.  Garnished with a fresh Strawberry" (with 4 Aspirin Canapes)…

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